An Indecent Proposal Poll

[madbaker]

One of my broker contacts recently got engaged. He and the girlfriend had been dating for quite some time, and she essentially told him to propose by the end of the year (2004) or break the relationship off.

He proposed at 12:20 AM, January 1 2005. Because he didn't want to end the relationship, but didn't want to give in to the ultimatum.

The wife said that in that situation she would have turned him down. Others have chuckled. What's your response?

[Poll #429926]

Comments

[wyterayven.livejournal.com]

Ok...to play the devils advocate.....and there is an aweful lot missing in the tale..

How long were they together? That makes a huge difference. Does she want kids? There is a finite time to make those kinds of decisions. If she wants a family, then she has to make some decisions. Health issues aside...does anyone really *want* to have teenagers in their mid to late 60's? And having kids is tremendously important to some people.

After all, she still needs time to find someone she can love, and go through that whole courtship ritual, get married and then have a family...that normally takes years. If she is 35 or 40 now, she doesnt have that kind of time to waste if she does want a family. And there are many people out there who really dont want to start a family when they arent married.

Is he just toying with her? Is he with her cause she is convenient and comfortable? I think he is a putz for playing head games like that. If he doesnt want to get married, then he should say so. She could then break it off and find someone who has the values that she's looking for, rather than stringing her along.

Is it actually wrong for someone to realize that their life is stagnating, and to stand up and say "Hey...there are things that I want out of life and needs I have that need to be met" when it looks like someone is playing with them?

Would it have been better for her to simply say "Its been nice, but bye now" with no warning? My guess would be that she has already talked to him about it, and he has brushed her off and not taken her seriously. Sometimes people need a wake up call.

Ultimatums are dangerous things....you really have to be careful if your going to give one, as I think they will usually blow up in your face.

I also agree with others though, in that if she felt she "had" to give an ultimatum, then perhaps they shouldnt be getting married.

[scendan.livejournal.com]

That is both a thorough and interesting analysis. :)

Hi there! Not heard from you in a while! :)

[wyterayven.livejournal.com]

Hiya! It has been a while. :)

Cant wait to see you again :)