Again, I’m the odd man out.

Conversation on the desk this morning --

Cow-orker: "To buy or not to buy?"
Me (instantly): "Aye, there's the rub. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune..."
Cow-orkers: (blank looks)
Me: "... never mind."

Ask not for whom the turgid drama bell tolls.

I left my lunch on the kitchen table this morning.
Truly, my life is a doom-laden maelstrom fraught with misery.

How British are you?

( What's it going to be then eh? )