Dark humor, 'cause it's all we have.

What You Can Buy Today
One share of CITI (Citibank) for less than 1 ATM fee
One share of GE (General Electric) for less than 1 light bulb
One share of GM (General Motors) for less than 1 gallon of regular
One share of AA (Alcoa) for less than 1 six pack of Bud
One share of CAT (Caterpillar) for less than 1 Tonka toy dump truck
One share of NYT (NY Times) for less than 1 Sunday newspaper